Another Neurodivergent Queer Writes A Blog!

It’s Britney, bitch. And Danger!

HERE’S A PLAYLIST! SPOTIFY AND APPLE.

One of the things I love about music is that I don’t have to have any idea what the lyrics are, whether it’s English or whatever else. We didn’t know what the hell One Republic was singing in that chorus, and neither did they.

I don’t know a single word of Bashar Murad’s Arabic song, or what in the world business a w has before an n in the title, as if it were some kind of vowel, but I know that the song fills my heart and almost makes me weep from this feeling of being on a dance floor surrounded by community, a kind of resilience through it all, defiance and determination but always a smile, always dancing through it. What more do I need to know?

What more do I need to know than the knowing optimism, the optimism despite the evidence, of Juli’s “Elektrisches Gefühl”? The music video for this, by the way, is exactly what the song feels like: dancing in the bathroom mirror as you scrub off the layer of depression that’s built up again, that feeling like yesterday was yesterday but “today will be a good day” (“heute wird ein guter Tag”).

What more do I need than to feel the propulsive longing of Therapie TAXI’s “Candide Crush,” the sense of visiting a dance floor you used to know to watch yourself dancing in that moment you never want to forget—until you did, but now you remember and you’re standing there watching yourself enlivened, practically electric in love, and the feeling is irrepressible.

Music speaks to all of us, mind body and spirit, all at once. Maybe your mind doesn’t grasp the words or the meaning, but your spirit has. And whatever rhythm, your body’s going to live out the waves of sound moving through you. That tapping foot, that cute lil jaunty step, those perfect nods all the sudden when you’re pulled into it despite your thinking-self.

Also, I have a secret I’ll share. The end of HEATED makes me tear up. I don’t think she meant it to make us reflective, but hearing her honor her uncle, who died like so many of the LGBTQIA2S+ community who would’ve mentored my generation, “UNCLE JOHNNY MADE MY DRESS!” It’s gutting to me. And like Lana says, “I’ve gots the taste for men who’re older, it’s always been so it’s no surprise,” so it’s that much worse as in it’s no surprise the man for me died with the majority of my missing mentors. I put Bashar Murad’s song after that, weeping it out while you dance on a crowded dance floor.

Finally, in homage to Billie Holiday singing “Strange Fruit” to end every one of her shows, Nina Simone—and Sarah Gunning has something to add right now, too, just as she was singing the truth in that room then. No percussion but the coughing of miners and their families. This woman gets it. “Oh, miner, won’t you organize, wherever you may be / and make this a land of freedom for workers like you and me.”

ps. Doechii though!!! 🖤 This girl is killing it!!! I have thoughts about her straight-up lifting Nicki Minaj’s Roman Polanski character. It’s such a good impersonation that I legit can’t tell it’s not Nicki Minaj. But as a (non-crazed) Barb since her mixtape days, I’m willing to enjoy it. Maybe it’ll stir up Nicki enough to get something solid out of her.

PPS. Mayhem!!! I can’t stop listening to it!! 10/10!! Plus it sounds like there’s going to be a follow-up or extended album real soon, and Gaga keeps mentioning Beyoncé and teasing Telephone, part II. Lord… If I were Bey, I’d be on that EP and use this wave to launch act iii—assuming she’s about to put out the rock/blues/pop magic the Hive’s all anticipating. If only! Anyway, Mayhem is a beautiful ride.